February 04, 2008
Yes, its that time of the week, a new review! Unfortunately,
it’s not a good one. In fact, it was so terrible to review; I feel that I lost
a part of my manliness in the process. So with out any further adieu, I present
Hillary Duffs new CD, Dignity.
I’m not going to lie; I was completely against this CD. But
I do it for the lulz, so I guess that kind of makes it ok. Feel free to laugh
at me, if you want to at anytime.
First off, the name of the CD is called Dignity, and that is
something that this album lacks completely. It is composed of absolute bukake. I
didn’t even listen to 30 seconds of the first song before I shut that shit off,
and then I promptly bashed my face into a mirror, to get the song out of my
head. Shitty beat and unbearably shitty lyrics, that’s what I call the song.
Some people say that this is her best CD to date. And that
she made the move from being a teenager to being an adult and her lyrics have
some “deeper meaning”. Right then my instant BS detector went off, there is no
deeper meaning, just some 20 year old broad trying to make people think that
she is smart, but in all reality, she’s just another blonde being a complete
R-tard. Also, her genre of music is classified as “bubblegum” music, what the
hell kind of music is that? Seriously, that sounds like something a group of 10 year olds
would listen too.
I really don’t have much more to say about this album, my
advice is, it sucks and is full, just like this picture.
(the end)
February 04, 2008
If any of you watched the Super Bowl you would know that
Doritos had this amazing commercial in which Doritos featured one lucky
musician to do some sort of music video. Well, fortunately for me, I got to see
it. The winner was one singer songwriter Kina Grannis.
Upon watching this I couldn’t help but want to stab my ears
and shove endless amounts of sharp objects into my eyes. Normally I am a sucker
for female singer songwriters, but this was just flat out and boring and sounded
like generic lyrics with generic vocals topped off with 4 chords of gayness.
I really don’t get how she won this contest...oh wait, it is because
she has boobs and is playing a guitar. One
problem, she isn’t attractive.
Here is the video so you can awe in all the suckery. Why am
I doing this? I have no idea.
February 01, 2008
I just recently played Juiced 2 HiN, and here is my review
of it.
I give this game a royal FAIL
From the beginning i could tell that this game was going to shit up my air. The
opening menu had some kind of rap music playing in the background, so the first
thing that I did was turn that shitte off in the options menu.
Next you get to create your character, and you have a choice, male or female.
Anyway, when you do decide on the gender of your character, you get to
customize everything, and I mean everything, from the distance the eyes are
apart to having a unibrow or not. This was one of my favorite ideas of the
game.
Then you get to choose your car, which in any racing game, blows at first. So
after I chose my Mx-5, I wanted to race. So I navigate the many menus, only to
learn that before you actually get to race, you can place bets with other
racers. Not caring to much about this particular feature, I rushed through it,
placing the highest bet amount possible, then after thinking about it for a
second, the computer backed down and cut the bet in half.
Finally, I get to race, I’m excited now. So I configure my keyboard, yes my
keyboard, and the race starts. I instantly notice that the engine noise of the
car is too unbearably loud for me to play, so after muting that noise, the race
continues. Everything is going good, then the first corner comes up so I go
into the corner and slam into the wall. Noticing that the car has shitty
turning abilities, I am instantly in last place. This continued through the
entire race, every time I slammed into a wall, i was instantly stopped. Then I
figured out the secret, you have to let off the gas, and then brake around the
corner. Who the fuck does that in a racing game? I want to go fast, not pansy
around the corner like a grandma. Needless to say, I lost the race.
After a few more races and a few more losses, I decided to quit playing it, and
am considering uninstalling it from my computer. It just isn’t an appealing
racing game. Easy on the eyes yes, but the game play is like beating you over
the head with frozen stupid.
